I felt very small

Found this on imgur and need to share it.

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Invisible Man

This short post is inspired by a blogger I follow, MakeItUltra (TM). On his particular entry I shared a quote from a poem I love that would be inspirational and make someone find light in his or her life. This quote, however, is something completely different for me. It is what you might say motivational to a particularly aggressive, or passive aggressive, state. Although I do not solely live by this, I think of it often when I am stuck around people who have more control or power than I do in a given situation.

“Live with your head in the lion’s mouth. I want you to overcome ’em with yeses, undermine ’em with grins, agree ’em to death and destruction, let ’em swoller you til they vomit or bust wide open. – Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison

The context of this quote comes from the narrator’s grandfather giving him advice about how to deal with “the white man.” Obviously this is not my purpose, though it gives sharp perspective into the feeling this quote implies. As an educator, I have had to work with many people with whom I fundamentally don’t agree, yet I’ve not been in a position to do anything about it. Instead of getting bent out of shape, I think about doing the right thing for the students in my classroom, and I “agree” to make it through whatever the situation calls for me to do. Even now, after the start of state testing, all I can do is smile and say, “Good luck!” to my students. There has been one situation where even this mindset couldn’t get me through, but that is a story for another day.

cover-Ralph-Ellison-Invisible-Man

The Very Best Part

Anyone like The Twilight Zone? It has been my all-time favorite television series since I was old enough to understand the plot of each episode. The more I watch and re-watch each season, the more I fall in love with the brilliance of human imagination.

My blog is named after my favorite episode, “Time Enough at Last.” In this particular situation, the main character lives in a world where he is made very small on a daily basis by his wife and his boss. His one true passion in life is to read… to get lost in tragedy, comedy, romance, and adventure… much like myself. When the tables turn and he is left in his own solitude, he finds true happiness and solace upon discovering a library with books, books, books! And in it, he says, “The thing of it is, the very best part, is I have time now. All the time I want, and all the time I need. Time enough at last.”

I won’t spoil the ending. My heart goes out to him.

It was the first episode to ever make me cry.

Time Enough at Last

Late Night Thoughts and Concubines

The title means nothing. Sometimes you just have a moment when you think of something clever of no significance. I knew if I drank coffee at 5:00PM (Sumatran roast) that I would have a rather difficult time falling asleep tonight. I’ve taken a shot of vodka to make me sleepy; now I just feel calm. Royal Pains is running on Netflix, my dog to my left and my cat to my right.

We all have the existential moments I suppose, when we think about what we’re doing in life; we reflect on what life would be like if we had made some different decisions. We also think about why our life became what it is because of the decisions we’ve made. Do my decisions mean anything? Should I have done something differently? Why am I the way I am…? No matter the questions, answers are not easily found.

Perhaps thinking about life at night is not a good decision. Perhaps I should just keep my mind shut before it leads me astray to bad decisions or life-changing reflections.

Don’t mind me. All who wander are not lost.